Tag: about Suz

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Babies

Finding Time for Me {Liberating Working Moms}

I thought I’d carved out last night for ‘me time’. The plan was for Jason to spend yesterday & today relaxing after his last day Wed & before he starts a new job Monday. And since he’d be off work, he could pick up & handle Zach & Lucy for a few hours Thurs evening so I could have a after work girl’s night with coworker friends.

Instead, he has pneumonia & spent the day at various doctor’s offices & the night in bed while I wrangled Zach & Lucy. Thankfully, the babies were great.

But that still leaves me questioning, when’s my time?

I’m six months into being a working mom & almost ten months into being a parent, & I feel like I have it kind of down. Of course, when Lucy &/or Zach are sick or teething, a wrench is thrown into the mix & I’m thrown off my “I got this” game. But those days aside, I’m fairly confident that I’m doing a good job balancing work & motherhood.

What I’m realizing I haven’t been doing such a great job keeping up is sometimes me. My one hour of pumping each work day {broke into three sessions} is my only ‘me time.’ It’s sometimes the only time during the whole week when I can sit down uninterrupted by work & personal phone calls, work & personal emails, coworkers, my husband &/or my babies. That hour a day is just me & my book or kindle or silly games on my cell. And yes, I happen to be attached to a machine pumping milk out of my breasts during this time which might tell you how chaotic my life is; that being hooked up to a pump is what I consider one of the most relaxing parts of my day.

I’m over at Liberating Working Moms today talking more about ‘me time’ & what I’m going to do once I stop pumping & lose that hour of ‘me time’ a day. From comments already & my social post, I know it gets easier & better. But I’d love you to jump over to LWM & tell me what you do for yourself.

Categories
Babies

Juggling the Unknown

I glance almost nervously every time my work phone rings wondering if it’ll be daycare saying one of the babies is sick. I make very few plans because I never know when they’re going to be sick. I’ve had to cancel a couple of the {very, very, very few} play dates of which we’ve been invited due to sickness.

And while we’ve dealt with our share of sickness this winter {on a three week well run WHAT WHAT?!}, it’s not just that. I never know what to expect anymore.

Am I going to find happy, chirping babies when I get off work? Or whiny, fussy, clingy ones? Will I have time to make dinner or will I cram cereal down at 930p?

Will the evening go smoothly & I’ll have time to unwind with my e-reader & clear off a show from the DVR? Or will I be totally whipped well after my own bedtime from wrangling over-tired babies?

As a newish mom, I struggle with juggling all the unknowns of motherhood. From diapering to sickness, teething & crying, to sleeping & solids. I’m guessing I’m not the only one adjusting to the new normal.

That’s something I love about my online community of bloggers & mothers; that I can write a quick post or shoot off a tweet & like it or not {mostly like it}, I’ll have more experienced mom friends offering advice or cheering me on. Because I need it more often than not.

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Babies Family/Travel

Is our king sized bed too small?

Alternative titles, ‘my hippie side is showing’ or ‘I should’ve been a hippie’; sung to the tune of my favorite Toby Keith song ‘I should’ve been a cowboy’.

I learned pre-babies to never say never. But as a new mom, I’ve continued to learn that lesson.

In our birth class, the instructor mentioned that 85% of new patents will co-sleep with their baby{s}. My husband was adamant that would not be us. I said sure; we’ll see.

I was sure Lucy & Zach were going to be sleeping in their cribs from day 1. Then day 1 & 2, Lucy slept in a pack-n-play while Zach was still in the NICU. We pulled out our rock-n-plays on her second day home & never looked back. For the first 3 months, they slept there in our den while there was an adult either up 24/7 or on the couch. We transitioned Lucy into a pack-n-play around 3 mos.

By 4-5 mos, they were sleeping in their cribs. And if Z or L wouldn’t return to their crib, either J or I would end up on the couch napping for the reminder of the night.

At some point over the last few months, with them being sick & also bigger, we’ve brought a baby, usually Zach, in bed with us occasionally. Other than the scary wheezing RSV nights & nights with his 24 hour stomach bug, these co-sleeping nights aren’t planned. Both babies will go down in their cribs pretty easily; we get them 99% asleep on us by rocking, jiggling or nursing, then transfer them into their crib with a kiss on the cheek & sound machine & humidifer turned on.

They’ll both fall asleep during overnight nursing. But sometimes there’s something about their crib that means little eyes pop open. And no rocking, bouncing, jiggling, or repeated nursing works. It’s those nights that Zach gets to cuddle into me nestled snugly in our king size bed between my husband & I. Co-sleeping in our house ends up being a result of me being too exhausted to fight getting them back to sleeping in the crib.

I will typically fight for crib sleeping if it’s before 4a. But there’s something about after 4a when the pull for more sleep beats out my desire to not share my bed with a tiny bed hog.

I think my husband’s desire to not co-sleep had more to do with fear of rolling over on said baby than anything else. I think they’re big enough now that he’s no longer worried about that. On principle, I don’t overly love the idea nor starting co-sleeping being a habit. But I go back to the ‘any sleep is better than none’ mantra.

Lucy, because she so often sleeps through the night (830-630!!), doesn’t co-sleep much during the week days. It’s weekends though that she’ll get in on the snuggles. After our nursing around 6, instead of running the risk of her waking still sleeping Zach, she & I will sneak past the nursery into our room.

As Tracy wrote on LWM this week, co-sleeping is also a little extra time that as a working mom, I get to spend in close proximity to my babe{s}. Waking up to Zach’s sweet snoring & tiny tucked hands brings a smile every time.

I’ve discovered more & more as I go along this parenting road that I’m pretty laid back. That I might’ve been a hippie in a prior life – an extended-breastfeeding, baby-wearing, homemade-baby-food-making {post to come}, co-sleeping hippie. And I like that!

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Everything Else

On Being Social

Before babies, my life was a mix of plans & spontaneity.

I looked forward to my monthly bunco night, book clubs, sorority alum meetings & dinner club, & small group Bible studies all on the calendar. I threw into the mix ladies nights, coworker happy hours & random, last minute dinner dates with the husband. I had the time & open schedule for walks with friends or alone with my ipod after work & on weekends. I jumped in the car on a whim for pedicures & haircuts & highlights.

As my pregnant belly got bigger, I began to scale back on the plans. Because I was too tired & I knew I wouldn’t & couldn’t keep up that schedule for the future. And I was right.

On a typical week, my calendar is blank. But my schedule is packed: babies, work, daycare pickup, traffic home, babies, cook/clean/laundry/diapers, bed.

I know this is the life of all new mothers, especially working mothers of multiples whose husband’s work late. And I love my children. I’m so glad they are in my life.

But I’m going to be honest & say that I miss my ladies nights {Jason getting home at 730+ doesn’t allow for me to make many}. I miss my coworker times {I pump through all my breaks & eat lunches at my desk making up sick time now, so even though I’m in the same building 40 hours a week, I rarely see my work friends}. I miss the quiet time for myself for reading, shopping & just generally having time to be lazy.

This isn’t a cry for help. I’m slowly getting back on my social heels. I’m relearning what it means now to be social: cramming in weekday lunch dates with friends; bringing a baby or two to meet friends for coffee on a Sunday afternoon; finding it relaxing to be able to grocery shop alone on a Saturday. I’m so thankful that I have time to read while pumping & my book club is a very baby friendly group.

I know that as they get older, as the days get lighter & warmer, we’ll be able to be more active out of the house. I’m looking forward to us being social as a family: walks together at the lakes this summer, early weekend dinners out; being invited to friends’ kiddos’ birthday parties.

And since I’m confessing, I’ll let y’all know I’m counting the days until my first overnight work trip {13 if you wanna keep up}. My parents are coming to help as babysitters; it’s only 1.5 hours away & for one or maybe two nights. But I’ll get to sleep in & not be woken up at night & enjoy adult conversation as well as a few adult beverages.

I’ve learned all my new social plans are made with a *. With a RSVP’d maybe. Because the babies come first. And I know this is okay. This is my new {maybe not so social} life.

How did/do you deal with the lifestyle change that came with parenthood? Were you able to seamlessly continue life the same with a baby in tow? For non-multiples moms, have you noticed a difference when a second baby was born?

Categories
Babies Everything Else

Happy Momma’s Break Day

Oh MLK. Thank you for your dream & for my work believing as I do that you’re worthy of a holiday. Thank you too that our daycare remained open.

Before the RSV diagnosis of last week {also see why I’ve been blog MIA} & husband’s bout of flu at.the.same.time, I had lofty plans for today. To do all the things! Shop! Sleep! Read! Blog from my laptop instead of cell! Catch up on photo editing! Cook & bake & make baby food!

The the sickness came {back} to our house leaving me single parenting two sick babies with the help of my Dad & the my mom. And my doing everything possible to stay well. So today, even though the babies are just starting to feel better, we packed them up at 10a & dropped them at already paid for care. I raced home {after splurging on CFA & stopping for bananas}, to pump & then nap. Nap without an ear out for crying babies & half an eye open watching the monitor. It was an hour & a half of glorious.

Then, because I still wanted to do all things, I ate, pumped again, baked pumpkin muffins & made avocado & banana purées. I didn’t really shop {I don’t really count online right?!} or get to read more of the hilarious Jen Lancaster’s new book & my DVR is still full. But that’s okay. I got my {much needed} break.

And I’m on my way to pick up L & Z on their 8 months old day a few hours early having heard from their teacher that they were fussy & crying most of the day. I’m feeling a bit renewed. My patient momma tank a bit more full. Ready to see how the evening goes & {never thought I’d say this} looking forward to getting back to work tomorrow.

Ever taken a Momma break day for yourself?