I’m going to make this a two part-er. This part? Not the “treat” in Suz’s Treats. Quite the opposite. It’s tough & I don’t know how to say it, so I just am.
At our 18 week high resolution scan yesterday, the ultrasound tech first spotted babies A & B. She went initially to baby B, searched for a second, said the words that I can’t forget “I can’t seem to find a heartbeat”. Silly, naive me thought, look harder, baby B can be shy! She measured baby A’s head then went back to baby B & measured it’s head too. Then she told us while baby A’s measured over 18 weeks, baby B stopped growing around 15 weeks 4 days. She tried finding any blood flow in or out & there was none.
She moved on to the scans of babies A & C; I was too in shock & too scared to say anything but Jason asked the question I was afraid to: what was going on with baby B?! She said something along the lines of it didn’t make it. I asked & she told us that baby B had been a girl.
She left the room {so I could change for her to check my cervix} & I just clung to husband & sobbed. She came back & then the doctor came in & he too seemed a bit in shock but was so awesome that I like him even more than before. To answer the question everyone seems to have, baby B’s small body is still there & will remain for the rest of this pregnancy.
So that’s the short of it. Our triplets are no longer triplets & I’m sad & for one of the first times ever, I’m kinda speechless.
I do want to thank my twitter friends for all their support yesterday {& today & everyday really}. It was amazing & so sweet to find 150+ replies after I tweeted about the loss of baby B. Y’all, love from family & friends, & the strength of prayer as well as babies A & C are helping us cope with this new turn of events.
Tomorrow, I’ll bring a treat {actually two!} back to Suz’s Treats & share photos & the sexes of our babies.

February 1, 2012 at 9:54 pm
Oh Suz. I bawled through this whole post because my heart just aches so much. And while I’m rejoicing that the two are doing well, I know it can’t fill the spot of the other little one.
You guys have been through so much. You’re in my prayers on a daily basis.
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February 1, 2012 at 9:58 pm
Oh, honey
I am so, so, so sorry for your loss.
February 1, 2012 at 10:19 pm
I’m so sorry, Suz.
February 1, 2012 at 10:21 pm
I am so so sorry. Lots of love.
February 1, 2012 at 10:22 pm
Your babies will always be triplets. And you have such an amazing strength. There is a reason you were chosen to be Baby Bs momma.
February 1, 2012 at 10:24 pm
I am so very sorry for your loss. <3
February 1, 2012 at 10:31 pm
I’m so sorry for your loss. Thinking of you.
February 1, 2012 at 10:35 pm
I’m so sorry. You will always be a triplet mama. We lost one of our identical twins at 20 weeks and it’s hard, even though we were lucky enough to have a perfectly healthy boy. So many emotions. I know you don’t know me but please email if you need to talk.
February 2, 2012 at 3:25 am
Suz, my heart goes out to you. I am so so very sorry for your loss. I can’t imagine what you’re going through. I’ve been keeping you in my thoughts. Huge hugs.
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February 2, 2012 at 3:31 am
I’m so, so sorry for your loss. Our thoughts and prayers are with your entire family.
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February 2, 2012 at 6:04 am
I’ve been reading along on your blog for awhile now, but thus far hadn’t commented. I just wanted you to know how sorry I am to read about the loss of your little girl, Baby B. Thinking of you from Australia, xox
February 2, 2012 at 6:40 am
I’m so sorry about Baby B. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
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February 2, 2012 at 7:53 am
My thoughts and prayers are with you. I am so sorry for your loss……
February 2, 2012 at 8:33 am
i’m so sorry Suz. Sweet baby girl.
The smallest children are nearest to God ~Jean Paul Richter
February 2, 2012 at 8:49 am
Suz, I am so very sorry about Baby B
I mentioned this on Twitter, but we went through something similar with my son. We discovered at our first u/s at almost 9 weeks that we had a vanished twin that had stopped growing a few days before. If we had an u/s earlier, we probably would have seen 2 heartbeats. I know it’s not quite the same as your sweet Baby B, but I remember going home and sobbing – happy for our very active baby but so sad for the one that didn’t make it.
I’m thinking of you and your sweet babies.
February 2, 2012 at 9:13 am
Oh Suz. I am so, so sorry. Sending lots of love and thoughts and prayers to you guys.
February 2, 2012 at 9:16 am
This is not easy. Please find some comfort in the knowledge of the virtual hugs and real prayers sent your way, from far away.
I’m sorry for this loss.
February 2, 2012 at 9:17 am
Suz- I am so sorry for you… baby “B” will always be with you and all three of them are so lucky to have you as their mama! Hugs mama!
February 2, 2012 at 9:34 am
Still so sorry to hear this news.
February 2, 2012 at 10:07 am
I’m so sorry, Suz. I am praying for Baby A and C.
February 2, 2012 at 10:58 am
Sending love and light to you all…
February 2, 2012 at 11:43 am
Suz, I have been following along but hadn’t commented. I am so sorry for your loss. You and Jason are in my prayers. LIXO
February 2, 2012 at 12:10 pm
Oh Suz, I just can’t imagine the emotions you and J are feeling. I am truly sorry for your loss and want you to know we are praying for you and for the babies. Your sweet baby girl will never be forgotten. ((hugs))
February 2, 2012 at 12:25 pm
You’re in our thoughts and prayers, Suz. You, Jason, Baby Girl B and your two thriving babies. You started out a triplet momma, and you’ll always be one in your heart – that’s where it matters most! <3 <3 <3
February 2, 2012 at 1:33 pm
Love you so much sweetie. I just can’t process it. So sorry but happy A & C are thriving.
February 2, 2012 at 2:04 pm
Oh my gosh Suz, I am so very sorry! ((((hugs)))))
February 2, 2012 at 2:06 pm
I am so sorry for your loss of Baby B.
Hugs my friend.
February 2, 2012 at 3:02 pm
Suz,
You are in my prayers and I’m so sorry. Baby A & baby C will always have a special angel watching over them. Thinking of you and sending hugs!
Mega
February 2, 2012 at 9:27 pm
Oh Suz, I’m just reading this update. I’m so sorry for your loss…many prayers are being said for you, I know. -mc
February 2, 2012 at 9:59 pm
I know there are no right words but know that we are all wrapping you in one big cyper-space hug. May God give you comfort.
February 2, 2012 at 11:05 pm
So sorry to hear about your loss but so happy to hear the results of A + C scans! Our prayers are with you and your family both of sorrow and joy! XOXO!
February 3, 2012 at 8:29 am
Thanks Callie! I appreciate it. I’ll be sure to be in touch with cloth diaper questions soon!
February 3, 2012 at 7:33 am
Sorry to hear about this
Praying for your smooth pregnancy & delivery.
Giving you cyber hugs all the way from Malaysia!
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February 3, 2012 at 9:30 am
I’m so sorry to hear this. I am thinking about you! xoxo
February 3, 2012 at 9:33 am
I’m so so sorry Suz. I don’t know what to say so I’ll just offer up my love and ((hugs))
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February 7, 2012 at 9:38 am
Thinking about you and Jason every day, Suz.
February 13, 2012 at 11:08 am
Oh Suzy I’m so sorry
(((((
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April 20, 2012 at 10:47 pm
I know this happened months ago but I was reading Babble tonight and saw your belly pic and had to click over to your blog. My husband and I were also expecting triplets and at our anatomy scan at 17 weeks we learned I’d lost Baby C. It remains the most confusing and heartbreaking thing I’ve ever been through. I’d never read another story of a second tri loss like this being discovered solely through u/s (and not bleeding or cramping or something else). I just wanted to say I’m sorry for your Baby B and I hope the remainder of your pregnancy goes well.
April 23, 2012 at 2:10 pm
Sona, thank you so much for this comment. I too don’t know of anyone else who’s experience a triplet loss in the second tri & yes, I had no symptoms. I’m sorry too for your loss & thank you again for the well wishes.
May 9, 2012 at 5:39 pm
So, so similar to my story..except I never knew what gender our baby B was. I wish I did. ((hugs))
May 9, 2012 at 5:45 pm
I’m so sorry for your loss. I hate that our stories are so similar, but I’m here for support. I’m sorry you weren’t able to find out th sex. It is something I’m glad we know.
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