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Pregnancy

Baby B

I’m going to make this a two part-er. This part? Not the “treat” in Suz’s Treats. Quite the opposite. It’s tough & I don’t know how to say it, so I just am.

At our 18 week high resolution scan yesterday, the ultrasound tech first spotted babies A & B. She went initially to baby B, searched for a second, said the words that I can’t forget “I can’t seem to find a heartbeat”. Silly, naive me thought, look harder, baby B can be shy! She measured baby A’s head then went back to baby B & measured it’s head too. Then she told us while baby A’s measured over 18 weeks, baby B stopped growing around 15 weeks 4 days. She tried finding any blood flow in or out & there was none.

She moved on to the scans of babies A & C; I was too in shock & too scared to say anything but Jason asked the question I was afraid to: what was going on with baby B?! She said something along the lines of it didn’t make it. I asked & she told us that baby B had been a girl.

She left the room {so I could change for her to check my cervix} & I just clung to husband & sobbed. She came back & then the doctor came in & he too seemed a bit in shock but was so awesome that I like him even more than before. To answer the question everyone seems to have, baby B’s small body is still there & will remain for the rest of this pregnancy.

So that’s the short of it. Our triplets are no longer triplets & I’m sad & for one of the first times ever, I’m kinda speechless.

I do want to thank my twitter friends for all their support yesterday {& today & everyday really}. It was amazing & so sweet to find 150+ replies after I tweeted about the loss of baby B. Y’all, love from family & friends, & the strength of prayer as well as babies A & C are helping us cope with this new turn of events.

Tomorrow, I’ll bring a treat {actually two!} back to Suz’s Treats & share photos & the sexes of our babies.

45 replies on “Baby B”

Oh Suz. I bawled through this whole post because my heart just aches so much. And while I’m rejoicing that the two are doing well, I know it can’t fill the spot of the other little one.
You guys have been through so much. You’re in my prayers on a daily basis.

I’m so sorry. You will always be a triplet mama. We lost one of our identical twins at 20 weeks and it’s hard, even though we were lucky enough to have a perfectly healthy boy. So many emotions. I know you don’t know me but please email if you need to talk.

I’ve been reading along on your blog for awhile now, but thus far hadn’t commented. I just wanted you to know how sorry I am to read about the loss of your little girl, Baby B. Thinking of you from Australia, xox

Suz, I am so very sorry about Baby B šŸ™ I mentioned this on Twitter, but we went through something similar with my son. We discovered at our first u/s at almost 9 weeks that we had a vanished twin that had stopped growing a few days before. If we had an u/s earlier, we probably would have seen 2 heartbeats. I know it’s not quite the same as your sweet Baby B, but I remember going home and sobbing – happy for our very active baby but so sad for the one that didn’t make it.

I’m thinking of you and your sweet babies.

This is not easy. Please find some comfort in the knowledge of the virtual hugs and real prayers sent your way, from far away.
I’m sorry for this loss.

Suz, I have been following along but hadn’t commented. I am so sorry for your loss. You and Jason are in my prayers. LIXO

Oh Suz, I just can’t imagine the emotions you and J are feeling. I am truly sorry for your loss and want you to know we are praying for you and for the babies. Your sweet baby girl will never be forgotten. ((hugs))

You’re in our thoughts and prayers, Suz. You, Jason, Baby Girl B and your two thriving babies. You started out a triplet momma, and you’ll always be one in your heart – that’s where it matters most! <3 <3 <3

Suz,
You are in my prayers and I’m so sorry. Baby A & baby C will always have a special angel watching over them. Thinking of you and sending hugs!
Mega

Oh Suz, I’m just reading this update. I’m so sorry for your loss…many prayers are being said for you, I know. -mc

I know this happened months ago but I was reading Babble tonight and saw your belly pic and had to click over to your blog. My husband and I were also expecting triplets and at our anatomy scan at 17 weeks we learned I’d lost Baby C. It remains the most confusing and heartbreaking thing I’ve ever been through. I’d never read another story of a second tri loss like this being discovered solely through u/s (and not bleeding or cramping or something else). I just wanted to say I’m sorry for your Baby B and I hope the remainder of your pregnancy goes well.

Sona, thank you so much for this comment. I too don’t know of anyone else who’s experience a triplet loss in the second tri & yes, I had no symptoms. I’m sorry too for your loss & thank you again for the well wishes.

I’m so sorry for your loss. I hate that our stories are so similar, but I’m here for support. I’m sorry you weren’t able to find out th sex. It is something I’m glad we know.

[…] We are a year out from the day last year that changed our life. January 31st 2012, we learned that our three in-utero babies were to be two future babies. Our baby A, Zach, & our baby C, Lucy. The dream of triplets, our dreams of life with three, died that day when we learned about baby B. […]

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